{ personal }

Mr. Good Enough's Informal Wedding Will Not Disappoint

Attended a buddy's wedding over the weekend.  Not a fan of traditional weddings.  Very uncomfortable being in a suit and tie--my one and only circa 1995 suit and tie.  A colleague once attended a ceremony/reception on a mountain summit where the guests came in hiking attire and gear (the couple were avid hikers).  Now, that sounds like an interesting wedding. 

I'm definitely going the informal route.  18th hole, Pebble Beach, come in your golf shoes (soft spikes only please), shorts (Bermuda length) and shirts (collared); and bring a wedge (conforming V grooves) for some after the ceremony fun.  Although, as Tiger has demonstrated, it might not be such a good idea to have metal sticks around the wife, in case you're caught checking out the attractive bridesmaid.

When I first started attending weddings as a young adult my thoughts were always the same: I can't believe blah and blah are getting married, that's crazy.  After 6 weddings in a year it became not so crazy.  It became normal.  These days, if you're not married or engaged at a wedding you're very much in the minority. 

It's not so bad for us guys, we always have golf and strippers, but I think it's tougher on women with their clock and whatnot.  So I tell the single ladies to get back with their asshole ex-boyfriends.  He might not be perfect but he's probably good enough.  Naturally, they think I'm crazy, but then I give them a copy of Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough.

Wedding these days are all about the children.  Friends my age--my age--with kids!  I can barely take care of myself and they're parents!  One buddy has two super cute daughters.  It gives me hope.  Me and him, we're no Brad Pitts, so if he can have a couple of adorable daughters I might stand a chance.  My biggest fear with children is that I'll disappoint them.  I know the pain of being disappointed by your parents and it scares the shit out of me that I'll disappoint my kids.

Stop!

A few things I need to stop doing

• eating so much fast food--makes me feel like shit in the long run
• drinking so much soda--don't want to wear dentures by the time i'm 50
• sleeping at 1 AM--bad for memory
• spending too much time on the computer before bed, fucks with my sleep cycle (see above)
• using my neck injury as an excuse not to do cardio and light workouts

Magic and Kobe to Wear Capris

The NBA finals are finally about to start.  That's the one thing I don't like about the NBA, so many games, some many playoff rounds, before the finals.  Baseball is even worse--something like 200 games during the season.  Anyways, all these flashback commercials on ESPN showing Magic "HIV ain't got shit on me" Johnson got me musing...why/when the short shorts?  Why and when did we switch to knee length shorts?  Take a look at Magic "AIDS what?" Johnson here,

and compare his shorts to Kobe "No Means Yes" Bryant's shorts.

The switch from short shorts to long shorts in the NBA is also seen in men's fashion.  (Thankfully, women's fashion remains constant: Daisy Dukes are awesome.)  Yet, when I wear capri pants (because I want to be European), my male friends make fun of me, thinking capris are for women.  Capri pants are the next logical step...

Mental Debt

It goes without saying, being in debt sucks.  I've just never been good with money.  A few years ago I was able to save a bit of money, enough to take some time off of work and travel, but now I'm back in the red.  And there's really nothing to show for it either.  I mean some people are up to their eye balls in debt because they drive a fancy car or live in a big house, but I drive a Yaris and live in the ghetto, as this homeless lady dragging a mattress across the street proves.

The one good thing about my neck injury is I've basically done nothing for two months and that has helped pay down the bills a little.  I need to be a hermit for another three months to get my debt under control.  Starting to really affect me mentally.  I mean it's not like I can't afford to eat or anything like that, but having this constant burden hanging over my head is not a good feeling.  Being in debt is hold me back.  I'm not sure from what, but it feels like it's holding me back from something.

Feeling Guilty

Since I don't have a wife I have to resort to alternative means for getting things done.  Laundry Locker for my wash-n-fold, the Keurig for preparing my morning cup of Joe, the Roomba for vacuuming, etc.  (I actually don't have a Roomba yet, but it's on the short list).  My friends' wives must be loving this.  Anyways, I've been trying to "cook" (make sandwiches, microwave frozen dinners) more, but I hate cleaning up.  So I've gone completely disposable dinnerware: paper plates, plastic forks, etc. 

Cost isn't so much an issue; I more than make up for it by eating at home.  But I feel a little guilty.  Imagine living in a city that is so into recycling, carbon footprint, renewable energy and sustainability--throwing away a paper plate and plastic fork every time I'm in the mood for a sandwich can't be good for the environment.  In my defense, I do drive a car that averages almost 36 MPG and don't have chilren.  But then again I do take long showers.  It's tough trying to be green when you're lazy.

Physical Therapy Continues

Physical therapy continues.  The therapist said I'm recovering nicely, but warns me to not be overly optimistic and unduly pessimistic.  Some days I'm going to feel great, other days I'm going to feel like I'm not recovering at all.  The other thing he says is to avoid heat compression.  Heat packs will make me feel really good, but will actually slow down the recovery, because it's an inflammatory problem I have.  I see the PT again right before Memorial Day weekend.  Hopefully he'll give me the go-ahead to play golf again.

Sunday Night Ramblings

Still can't decide if Jenson Button won or Rubens Barrichello lost.  It does look like team orders, but Ross Brawn straight out said Barrichello wasn't fast enough in the 2nd stint to make the (faster) 3-stop strategy work.  If it was team orders wouldn't he have he been a little more polite?

So happy Tiger struggled today. I'm a Tiger Hater.  But not happy that the Lakers lost. I think we're just trying to make things more exciting for the fans.  Still not worried.

Went clothes shopping today.  It's been a while since I've bought new clothes.  The older I get the less I care about how stylish or fashionable I look, but I don't want to look like a total bum, so I bought a couple of polo shirts, sunglasses and a pair of thongs (you probably call them sandals or slippers).  I used to always wear socks with thongs, not wanting to expose my feet.  But these days I can't imagine wearing socks with thongs.

Trying to be more healthy.  Bought some Benefiber.  Also cutting down on my fast food intake.  Will try to pack lunch this week.  Cheaper and hopefully healthier.

Cleaned my coffee tumblers with denture tablets.  Odor is gone.

Bought one of those Homedics chair massagers.  My neck/shoulder problem is getting better, but I still feel very tense/tight/stiff.  The massager helps a little.  And cheaper than spending $400/month on massages.  Still, nothing can replace the touch of the human hands.

Apartment has never been cleaner.  Since I've been spending so much time at home resting I've kept it very clean.  I've also thrown out a lot of things so it's more spacious and comfortable.  Renewed my lease for another 6 months.  Tempted to move, but too much things going on right now to bother with finding a new place, etc.

The Keurig Platinum Coffee Maker

Every time I go to Starbucks I'm reminded that I piss away $80 a month on lattes.  Plus it's just a hassle to find parking, avoid the bums, and wait in line in the morning when you're rushing to work.  So I decided to buy a coffee maker.  But the problem is I'm really, really lazy when it comes to "making" things, be it a cup of coffee or my bed.  Luckily, I'm not alone.  There's an entire market for single serve coffee makers.  I ended up going with the Keurig Platinum. 

With traditional coffee makers you buy some coffee, put in a filter, pour in some water, and let it brew for several minutes.  Then you have to remove the filter and clean things up.  What a hassle.  But with the Keurig you buy these packages (called K Cups), pop them in, and in 60 seconds you have your coffee.  Virtually no preparation and virtually no cleanup.  Each K Cup costs about 50 cents, so at a savings of $2.50/day the Keurig will pay for itself in about 2-3 months. 

Amazon.com - World's Biggest Sex Toy Seller

Who knew, Amazon.com sells sex toys.  Check out this life-like vagina and anus masturbation toy.  Yup, sold by Amazon.com (gift-wrap available, free super saver shipping eligible).  I discovered this while searching for a Homedics chair massager.  My only complaint is it might be a little embarrassing if my co-worker doesn't know the full story and sees it in my recent history.  

Love the Foam Roller

Haven't felt this good in a while.  I think it's the foam roller.  My physical therapist is having me lie on a foam roller to loosen my back/neck/shoulders.  I think he'll eventually have me roll perpendicular to the roller, but for now I'm just lying on it.  Seems to really help.  I probably could play golf if I really push it, but I'm going to hold off for another couple of weeks.  Don't want to re-aggravate the nerves.

Good thing I'm getting better, because I was going broke spending all my money on massages.  According to Mint.com last month I spent $438 dollars on massages.  The first couple sessions were worth it, but that last two didn't really do much.